Hai guyz. I just wanted ya'll to know that I have a side blog going, as if one wasn't pretentious enough.
Twaddle
It's basically just an outlet for me to go on and on about songs I like so that I don't have to keep thinking about how I'd like to tell someone all these inane thoughts. It's not too interesting and you don't have to read my ravings (though I'd appreciate it if you did har har) but you may discover some new music, perhaps...?!
Of course, I've only made one post so maybe that will be it for Twaddle. Oh well.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Its news is captured for the queen to use
I've noticed many of my peers (and just people in general) trashing my home, the city of Springfield, Missouri. And I honestly cannot understand why. It's actually pretty ridiculous, I think.
Keep in mind I'm not someone who gets to travel the world and go to whatever country/state/city I please since I failed at college, I don't have a lot of money and my parents aren't millionaires. But I have been to my fair share of places around the United States, and while I definitely prefer certain places, Springfield definitely stands up against some particular trashy egotistical bloated disasters.
Rarely have I walked around downtown in Springfield and actually felt like I was in danger. Most of the "incidents" I've had are a couple people asking me if I smoke pot, or if I have a cigarette, or change, or whatever. That all happens everywhere. I won't say I feel 100% safe, of course. I HAVE had some things stolen from my car downtown, a guy grabbed my friend Aaron and started yelling crazy obscene things at him, me and my friends got "threatened" by some redneck at Hooters (not downtown but still) but these things happen. Springfield is pretty easy going otherwise, not counting the north side of course.
On the other hand, I don't even feel safe driving down 71 in Kansas City because people are going 30 mph over the limit and merging wherever and whenever they please without warning. Never mind being in the city itself, or downtown. Kansas City is awful, perhaps the worst place I've ever visited. Every time it is just completely awful. Maybe the occasional person is nice, but the whole place is just a big urban wasteland disaster and I hate it. I haven't been to St. Louis in years, but from what I remember it's even worse (East St. Louis in particular, I just remember it being VERY black, VERY dilapidated, and very scary).
Another thing: for the 160,000 or however many people there are, traffic is not that bad at all. Usually. Unfortunately they had to go Fallout 3 on the 60/65 intersection and make it very Kansas City-esque, but other than that and a couple other areas, it is not bad at all. Ozark was MUCH worse traffic-wise last year, before they finished adding lanes. I've never had to wait 30 minutes at one light in Springfield like I've had to in Ozark. I've never come to a dead stop in four lanes of traffic during rush hour like in Kansas City, or in eight lanes like in Seattle. Speaking of traffic matters, what is the deal with Joplin? If you want to trash a city, why not Joplin? That place has almost nothing going for it, other than a convenient location (between Kansas City, Tulsa, Springfield and Fayetteville). It's not really that big but it's SO congested and pretty trashy.
Another thing I hate is when Springfield gets some new store or some trend hits here and everyone thinks it's "cute" that Springfield finally got something or that it's not cool anymore now that it's in Springfield. I was reading reviews of the Orange Leaf here and some broad from California was talking about how cute it was that quaint little Springfield got an Orange Leaf but of course it paled in comparison. Who cares, really?
I have to admit that I can name more great local attractions in Seattle and Portland than in Springfield, but part of that may because we actually looked for those kinds of things there more than here, where we take it for granted. We have some pretty cool places though. Grad School is one of the best restaurants ever, and nobody can deny that. Everything they have there is amazing. Trolley's is another good restaurant, as well as the Spring Creek Tea Room (okay, it's in Ozark but still... oh, and my mommy works there lozl) and there are some great coffee places too. So yes, there are some great places here, it's just that nobody bothers to look for them.
There ARE some things I don't like about being here though. I hate that there is only one actual record store, and the only reason it stays in business is because they also sell bongs and other related items. I don't like that few big name bands ever come through here, and we have to suffer through an adventure in Kansas City to see our favorite bands. I don't like the influence Branson has over the area, but that's not necessarily Springfield's fault, just bad luck. I don't like all the rednecks, but honestly there are rednecks in most of the country, not just Missouri. I cannot stand the weather, but again, that's a midwest thing. We went to Arkansas a couple months ago and it was even worse there.
It seems that some of the people I went to school with are fairly content here, while the rest like to criticize everything about Springfield, while my friends from Nevada generally seem to like it more here. That's kind of funny I guess. I just don't understand all the hate.
Keep in mind I'm not someone who gets to travel the world and go to whatever country/state/city I please since I failed at college, I don't have a lot of money and my parents aren't millionaires. But I have been to my fair share of places around the United States, and while I definitely prefer certain places, Springfield definitely stands up against some particular trashy egotistical bloated disasters.
Rarely have I walked around downtown in Springfield and actually felt like I was in danger. Most of the "incidents" I've had are a couple people asking me if I smoke pot, or if I have a cigarette, or change, or whatever. That all happens everywhere. I won't say I feel 100% safe, of course. I HAVE had some things stolen from my car downtown, a guy grabbed my friend Aaron and started yelling crazy obscene things at him, me and my friends got "threatened" by some redneck at Hooters (not downtown but still) but these things happen. Springfield is pretty easy going otherwise, not counting the north side of course.
On the other hand, I don't even feel safe driving down 71 in Kansas City because people are going 30 mph over the limit and merging wherever and whenever they please without warning. Never mind being in the city itself, or downtown. Kansas City is awful, perhaps the worst place I've ever visited. Every time it is just completely awful. Maybe the occasional person is nice, but the whole place is just a big urban wasteland disaster and I hate it. I haven't been to St. Louis in years, but from what I remember it's even worse (East St. Louis in particular, I just remember it being VERY black, VERY dilapidated, and very scary).
Another thing: for the 160,000 or however many people there are, traffic is not that bad at all. Usually. Unfortunately they had to go Fallout 3 on the 60/65 intersection and make it very Kansas City-esque, but other than that and a couple other areas, it is not bad at all. Ozark was MUCH worse traffic-wise last year, before they finished adding lanes. I've never had to wait 30 minutes at one light in Springfield like I've had to in Ozark. I've never come to a dead stop in four lanes of traffic during rush hour like in Kansas City, or in eight lanes like in Seattle. Speaking of traffic matters, what is the deal with Joplin? If you want to trash a city, why not Joplin? That place has almost nothing going for it, other than a convenient location (between Kansas City, Tulsa, Springfield and Fayetteville). It's not really that big but it's SO congested and pretty trashy.
Another thing I hate is when Springfield gets some new store or some trend hits here and everyone thinks it's "cute" that Springfield finally got something or that it's not cool anymore now that it's in Springfield. I was reading reviews of the Orange Leaf here and some broad from California was talking about how cute it was that quaint little Springfield got an Orange Leaf but of course it paled in comparison. Who cares, really?
I have to admit that I can name more great local attractions in Seattle and Portland than in Springfield, but part of that may because we actually looked for those kinds of things there more than here, where we take it for granted. We have some pretty cool places though. Grad School is one of the best restaurants ever, and nobody can deny that. Everything they have there is amazing. Trolley's is another good restaurant, as well as the Spring Creek Tea Room (okay, it's in Ozark but still... oh, and my mommy works there lozl) and there are some great coffee places too. So yes, there are some great places here, it's just that nobody bothers to look for them.
There ARE some things I don't like about being here though. I hate that there is only one actual record store, and the only reason it stays in business is because they also sell bongs and other related items. I don't like that few big name bands ever come through here, and we have to suffer through an adventure in Kansas City to see our favorite bands. I don't like the influence Branson has over the area, but that's not necessarily Springfield's fault, just bad luck. I don't like all the rednecks, but honestly there are rednecks in most of the country, not just Missouri. I cannot stand the weather, but again, that's a midwest thing. We went to Arkansas a couple months ago and it was even worse there.
It seems that some of the people I went to school with are fairly content here, while the rest like to criticize everything about Springfield, while my friends from Nevada generally seem to like it more here. That's kind of funny I guess. I just don't understand all the hate.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Move on
I got a call from my mom today. I probably should have interpreted this call as hopeful and optimistic, a "step in the right direction" and all that, but part of me keeps going back to the negative.
So my cousin got a job teaching at a music store that happens to be right by where I live. I guess this was possible because he knows somebody there, and my mother was telling me about it and wanting him to put in a good word for me. Sounds great, right? Well, it is. But it's still upsetting.
Of course I'm interested, that's not the problem. It's just another thing that makes me feel like a slacker/failure. I realize "they're trying to help" but if I were a decent human I would have gotten to that point myself. But I'm not so I didn't. Someone four years younger than me got there first. I don't mean that to be demeaning to anyone else, but it makes me feel like the failure of the family. "Wow, 16 and teaching, that's great! Now let's see if we can do something with this embarassment of a human." That's what it feels like. Last time the family got together I was being questioned by everybody about my choice to not return to college and what my future plans were, and now I feel like I'm even deeper in that hole.
You're probably wondering "Well, why don't you just go for it, you idiot?". And I'm going to try. One of three things will happen. The most promising is that I get a job teaching music and enjoy it, and cut down on hours at Pizza Hut significantly. Then I will have two jobs to support myself until something bigger comes along. Haha, just kidding about the last part. Or, I could get the job and hate it because of stupid kids, stupid parents, or people I work with, or whatever, and then I'm back to where I started. The worst scenario would be that nobody wants me and I lose what little hope I have now and drown myself in the Acid Tunnel.
I'm tired of letting everybody down. The last two and a half years have been spent doing just that, and I'm tired of it. I'm glad people are trying to help but they shouldn't have to, I should be able to help myself. But I can't. What is my problem? Why are people so much younger than me so far ahead of me in life? Am I crippled by some mental deficiency that everybody knows about except for me?
:(
So my cousin got a job teaching at a music store that happens to be right by where I live. I guess this was possible because he knows somebody there, and my mother was telling me about it and wanting him to put in a good word for me. Sounds great, right? Well, it is. But it's still upsetting.
Of course I'm interested, that's not the problem. It's just another thing that makes me feel like a slacker/failure. I realize "they're trying to help" but if I were a decent human I would have gotten to that point myself. But I'm not so I didn't. Someone four years younger than me got there first. I don't mean that to be demeaning to anyone else, but it makes me feel like the failure of the family. "Wow, 16 and teaching, that's great! Now let's see if we can do something with this embarassment of a human." That's what it feels like. Last time the family got together I was being questioned by everybody about my choice to not return to college and what my future plans were, and now I feel like I'm even deeper in that hole.
You're probably wondering "Well, why don't you just go for it, you idiot?". And I'm going to try. One of three things will happen. The most promising is that I get a job teaching music and enjoy it, and cut down on hours at Pizza Hut significantly. Then I will have two jobs to support myself until something bigger comes along. Haha, just kidding about the last part. Or, I could get the job and hate it because of stupid kids, stupid parents, or people I work with, or whatever, and then I'm back to where I started. The worst scenario would be that nobody wants me and I lose what little hope I have now and drown myself in the Acid Tunnel.
I'm tired of letting everybody down. The last two and a half years have been spent doing just that, and I'm tired of it. I'm glad people are trying to help but they shouldn't have to, I should be able to help myself. But I can't. What is my problem? Why are people so much younger than me so far ahead of me in life? Am I crippled by some mental deficiency that everybody knows about except for me?
:(
Monday, August 9, 2010
Insubordination
I'm beginning to think all of these wrongdoings at work are either to save money or just to spite me, or both. Every bad thing that has happened (minus the occasional bout of pure bad luck) recently can be blamed on one of those two things.
For instance, why, on what is often the busiest day of the week (or at least one of them), would you not have anyone else come in until 5:30 when someone normally goes in at 4 every day? Why, after numerous complaints about needing a fourth person to help things run more smoothly, do we continue to have just three people (one of whom goes in an hour and a half late). Who does that?
Why do I and my fellow lackeys have to be the ones to take care of everything that goes wrong? Something breaking, running out of something, all someone else's mistake or problem. I've never questioned these things at work, I always wait until I'm gone to begin my ranting. I've never made a fuss about it at work, yet I'm the one who gets in trouble for us losing "points" because I forgot to shave or I didn't do my regular cleaning job one day because I had already stayed two hours later than I was supposed to because someone called in and nobody bothered to try and get someone else. If a customer really cared that the person dealing with their food hadn't shaved in two days or has long hair and happens to be a male (which obviously means that he doesn't bathe and also smokes marijuana and worships Satan) they should be shot anyway. If I am the one who is blamed for us missing out on some ultimately useless "points" because some higher-up thinks I don't suck their cock as much as everyone else, I can just show them the mold in the ice machine and under the sinks. OHHHH suck it!
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Also am I the only one who doesn't "get" these pictures of pregnant women? Maybe it's just me, but I don't like seeing pregnant bellies. At all. I know it's natural but it looks gross. I'm tired of pictures of these stupid people making the heart shape over their belly button while talking about how they'll be the best single mother ever because they decided to get knocked up at age 18 by someone they'd known for maybe two weeks. Also I swear to God I saw a picture a pregnant chick took of herself while she was driving. Why are these people allowed to live?!
For instance, why, on what is often the busiest day of the week (or at least one of them), would you not have anyone else come in until 5:30 when someone normally goes in at 4 every day? Why, after numerous complaints about needing a fourth person to help things run more smoothly, do we continue to have just three people (one of whom goes in an hour and a half late). Who does that?
Why do I and my fellow lackeys have to be the ones to take care of everything that goes wrong? Something breaking, running out of something, all someone else's mistake or problem. I've never questioned these things at work, I always wait until I'm gone to begin my ranting. I've never made a fuss about it at work, yet I'm the one who gets in trouble for us losing "points" because I forgot to shave or I didn't do my regular cleaning job one day because I had already stayed two hours later than I was supposed to because someone called in and nobody bothered to try and get someone else. If a customer really cared that the person dealing with their food hadn't shaved in two days or has long hair and happens to be a male (which obviously means that he doesn't bathe and also smokes marijuana and worships Satan) they should be shot anyway. If I am the one who is blamed for us missing out on some ultimately useless "points" because some higher-up thinks I don't suck their cock as much as everyone else, I can just show them the mold in the ice machine and under the sinks. OHHHH suck it!
.
..
...
..
.
Also am I the only one who doesn't "get" these pictures of pregnant women? Maybe it's just me, but I don't like seeing pregnant bellies. At all. I know it's natural but it looks gross. I'm tired of pictures of these stupid people making the heart shape over their belly button while talking about how they'll be the best single mother ever because they decided to get knocked up at age 18 by someone they'd known for maybe two weeks. Also I swear to God I saw a picture a pregnant chick took of herself while she was driving. Why are these people allowed to live?!
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Quaternary
On a lighter note, Whitney and I have a common interest in the fourth track from several albums. As in, the fourth song seems to be a common favorite, more often from albums with not as many songs (ie, not albums with 18 songs). So for those of you who don't care, here is a list of those that I could remember:
Aerosmith
Rocks: Combination (one of a few favorites)
Alice in Chains
Dirt: Down in a Hole (okay, my second favorite, but still)
The Beatles
Magical Mystery Tour: Blue Jay Way (there are a few favorites and this is one)
Let it Be: I Me Mine
Big Star
#1 Record: Thirteen (thanks Whitney)
Black Sabbath
Master of Reality: Children of the Grave
Sabbath Bloody Sabbath: Sabbra Cadabra
Days of the New
Days of the New II: Weapon and the Wound
Days of the New III: Die Born (one of two favorites)
Elliott Smith
Either/Or: Between the Bars
Elton John
Madman Across the Water: Madman Across the Water (either this or Tiny Dancer)
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (the first four are all the best)
Fleetwood Mac
Future Games: Future Games
Mystery to Me: Hypnotized (one of a few)
Heroes Are Hard to Find: Bermuda Triangle
Fleetwood Mac: Rhiannon
Funkadelic
Let's Take it to the Stage: No Head No Backstage Pass
Incubus
Make Yourself: The Warmth
Jerry Cantrell
Boggy Depot: Settling Down
Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin: Dazed and Confused
Led Zeppelin III: Since I've Been Loving You
Led Zeppelin IV: Stairway to Heaven
Physical Graffiti (Disc Two): Ten Years Gone
Meat Puppets
Meat Puppets II: Plateau
The Offspring
Smash: Gotta Get Away (one of a few)
Ixnay on the Hombre: Me and My Old Lady
Pink Floyd
Dark Side of the Moon: Time
Queens of the Stone Age
Lullabies to Paralyze: Tangled up in Plaid
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Freaky Styley: If You Want Me to Stay (a cover, but still)
The Uplift Mofo Party Plan: Backwoods (it's a close call for favorite. This is one of them)
By the Way: Dosed (again, it's pretty close between about four songs)
The Rolling Stones
Sticky Fingers: Can't You Hear Me Knocking (one of a few favorites)
Goats Head Soup: Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo (Heartbreaker)
Black and Blue: Memory Motel
Sly and the Family Stone
There's a Riot Goin' On: Family Affair
Soundgarden
Screaming Life: Nothing to Say
Ultramega OK: Beyond the Wheel
Them Crooked Vultures
Them Crooked Vultures: Dead End Friends (one of a few favorites)
Type O Negative
Dead Again: September Sun
Yes
The Yes Album: I've Seen All Good People
Fragile: South Side of the Sky
Aerosmith
Rocks: Combination (one of a few favorites)
Alice in Chains
Dirt: Down in a Hole (okay, my second favorite, but still)
The Beatles
Magical Mystery Tour: Blue Jay Way (there are a few favorites and this is one)
Let it Be: I Me Mine
Big Star
#1 Record: Thirteen (thanks Whitney)
Black Sabbath
Master of Reality: Children of the Grave
Sabbath Bloody Sabbath: Sabbra Cadabra
Days of the New
Days of the New II: Weapon and the Wound
Days of the New III: Die Born (one of two favorites)
Elliott Smith
Either/Or: Between the Bars
Elton John
Madman Across the Water: Madman Across the Water (either this or Tiny Dancer)
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (the first four are all the best)
Fleetwood Mac
Future Games: Future Games
Mystery to Me: Hypnotized (one of a few)
Heroes Are Hard to Find: Bermuda Triangle
Fleetwood Mac: Rhiannon
Funkadelic
Let's Take it to the Stage: No Head No Backstage Pass
Incubus
Make Yourself: The Warmth
Jerry Cantrell
Boggy Depot: Settling Down
Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin: Dazed and Confused
Led Zeppelin III: Since I've Been Loving You
Led Zeppelin IV: Stairway to Heaven
Physical Graffiti (Disc Two): Ten Years Gone
Meat Puppets
Meat Puppets II: Plateau
The Offspring
Smash: Gotta Get Away (one of a few)
Ixnay on the Hombre: Me and My Old Lady
Pink Floyd
Dark Side of the Moon: Time
Queens of the Stone Age
Lullabies to Paralyze: Tangled up in Plaid
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Freaky Styley: If You Want Me to Stay (a cover, but still)
The Uplift Mofo Party Plan: Backwoods (it's a close call for favorite. This is one of them)
By the Way: Dosed (again, it's pretty close between about four songs)
The Rolling Stones
Sticky Fingers: Can't You Hear Me Knocking (one of a few favorites)
Goats Head Soup: Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo (Heartbreaker)
Black and Blue: Memory Motel
Sly and the Family Stone
There's a Riot Goin' On: Family Affair
Soundgarden
Screaming Life: Nothing to Say
Ultramega OK: Beyond the Wheel
Them Crooked Vultures
Them Crooked Vultures: Dead End Friends (one of a few favorites)
Type O Negative
Dead Again: September Sun
Yes
The Yes Album: I've Seen All Good People
Fragile: South Side of the Sky
People try to put us down, just because we get around
I hate my generation. I mean that literally, I'm not talking about the song. I know every other generation of humans had their share of failures as well, and maybe it's just because I have to grow up with these people but I am disgusted by so many people my age. Where do I start?
I hate all these marriages that are happening out of nowhere, and most of them are probably happening because it's between two "upstanding" religious folks who just can't wait to bone each other but have to wait because otherwise they would make God cry, so they get married after five months and suddenly everything is awful! Oh no!
On the other hand, at least those people generally aren't polluting the world as much as those OTHER people, the ones who continue to pop these hopeless children into the world. I say hopeless because, well, there is no hope. I'm not blaming these multitudes of babies, even though I will be in 16 years when they make the same mistake. Why are these people so stupid? I graduated high school three years ago and I'd say anywhere between 1/4 and 1/3 of the girls I graduated with (or would have graduated with) have already had children. Because 21 is the perfect age to do such a thing as continue to pollute the world with more humans.
And I don't like how everyone is so full of themselves. I feel guilty having this blog and making my ridiculous "witty" blog titles and giving everyone my asinine opinions on things that don't matter, and filling people who don't care in on the happenings of my life via Facebook. I feel guilty playing music and thinking that maybe someone would care about it, when no one has a reason to care about anything I do. So I suppose I'm full of myself also. But some people are really ridiculous. You know, people being cryptic with their insults to someone they're angry at, and maybe even trying to be poetic about it, when it's really just angst at its most watered down. Or people who just try really hard to be so artsy or "alternative" or whatever, when they should just, as cliche as it is, be themselves. I stopped trying to impress people sometime in high school when I realized I was awful at it. Well, I guess I still WANT people to think I'm cool or whatever. Doesn't everybody? But I've never resorted to straightening my hair and wearing bright girl clothes and all that to make people like me, and I never decided that "if I drink with THESE people I'll be awesome!" or anything like that.
I'm not glorifying myself, I hate myself. I'm just saying that everyone who knows me knows what I'm really like: an awkward, angsty fail. It's not like I go to hang out with my church-going friends and talk about how Jesus rocks, then go to party it up with some PARTY ANIMALS or whatever they're called these days. I just exist. And that's the other thing I hate, but that doesn't just apply to people my age, it's everybody. But I won't bother, that's just the typical "people are so fake" rant. No one cares.
As usual this post went way off topic and I forgot my point and I had to point that out at the end.
I hate all these marriages that are happening out of nowhere, and most of them are probably happening because it's between two "upstanding" religious folks who just can't wait to bone each other but have to wait because otherwise they would make God cry, so they get married after five months and suddenly everything is awful! Oh no!
On the other hand, at least those people generally aren't polluting the world as much as those OTHER people, the ones who continue to pop these hopeless children into the world. I say hopeless because, well, there is no hope. I'm not blaming these multitudes of babies, even though I will be in 16 years when they make the same mistake. Why are these people so stupid? I graduated high school three years ago and I'd say anywhere between 1/4 and 1/3 of the girls I graduated with (or would have graduated with) have already had children. Because 21 is the perfect age to do such a thing as continue to pollute the world with more humans.
And I don't like how everyone is so full of themselves. I feel guilty having this blog and making my ridiculous "witty" blog titles and giving everyone my asinine opinions on things that don't matter, and filling people who don't care in on the happenings of my life via Facebook. I feel guilty playing music and thinking that maybe someone would care about it, when no one has a reason to care about anything I do. So I suppose I'm full of myself also. But some people are really ridiculous. You know, people being cryptic with their insults to someone they're angry at, and maybe even trying to be poetic about it, when it's really just angst at its most watered down. Or people who just try really hard to be so artsy or "alternative" or whatever, when they should just, as cliche as it is, be themselves. I stopped trying to impress people sometime in high school when I realized I was awful at it. Well, I guess I still WANT people to think I'm cool or whatever. Doesn't everybody? But I've never resorted to straightening my hair and wearing bright girl clothes and all that to make people like me, and I never decided that "if I drink with THESE people I'll be awesome!" or anything like that.
I'm not glorifying myself, I hate myself. I'm just saying that everyone who knows me knows what I'm really like: an awkward, angsty fail. It's not like I go to hang out with my church-going friends and talk about how Jesus rocks, then go to party it up with some PARTY ANIMALS or whatever they're called these days. I just exist. And that's the other thing I hate, but that doesn't just apply to people my age, it's everybody. But I won't bother, that's just the typical "people are so fake" rant. No one cares.
As usual this post went way off topic and I forgot my point and I had to point that out at the end.
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